Feeling the Backlash
by Heel Princess
Summary: Oneshot: Lita/John for the sake of writing Lita/John. Explains the events of Backlash 06. read and review please :


**I miss writing Cena/Lita and when i watched the Backlash 06 match yesterday i couldnt resist. Lita looked so sad the whole time, and during the end she looked so concerned for John that i had to write this, I guess its pretty pointless just let me know what you think read and review :)**

I couldn't help but cringe when I looked up to see John Cena attempting to FU Edge from the top rope. No, not because Edge was my boyfriend, because lets face it anyone with a little thing called the Internet knew that _that_ ship had long since sailed. No it wasn't because Adam was in harms way at all, it was because I saw Triple H coming.

There was nothing I could do but watch as Paul hooked his arms around John's legs and flung him backward, sending both men on his shoulders flying onto the mat. I was horrified, as much as I trusted that he knew how to take a fall after his years in the ring the way John landed looked terribly painful and I couldn't seem to figure out if he was ok or not.

That's why I lingered so long, you can see it on camera. I just stood there looking into the ring pondering if I should throw kayfabe out the window to see if he was all right. I noticed Edge roll out of the ring in the background and I knew as his valet and on screen girlfriend it was my obligation to look worried for him. But all I could think about was if John was ok, the man I was supposed to hate but was somehow madly in love with.

Moving on nothing but instinct I ran from where I was standing to the other side of the ring, grabbing a steel chair on my way. It wasn't a spot, it was just out of pure desperation, and luckily I knew that it would look like I was trying to help Edge if I whacked Paul with the damn thing. When all I was really trying to do was keep him from touching John. I didn't want him injured, the match was brutal and if he was already beat up bad any more bumps could do serious damage. So I just reacted, like anyone else would.

But it all seemed to backfire when he saw me, so I swung and Paul tried to cover both our characters asses by grabbing me and driving me into the canvas with a devastating spine buster. Which in turn caused me to loose my grip on the chair and send it crashing onto my skull on the way down.

I think I blacked out for a second but I heard the crowed roar so I knew Triple H was now holding the chair, yet by some divine act of god he threw it down. Maybe the man had a soul after all; maybe for once he was worried John was hurt too and not just out to make his own ass immortal in the twisted world that is wrestling.

Rolling myself out of the ring I thought maybe we were in the clear, John would be fine and I wouldn't be figured out for trying to protect him. I attempted to stand up to watch the finish that I knew was coming, but I couldn't seem to find the strength. So I just stayed there on the floor outside the ring and waited, trying to catch my breath.

Then I saw him walk by me, Paul, wielding his best friend the sledgehammer and I knew it was all over. The only thing I was thankful for at that moment was that there was no close up on me, because I was already crying thinking of the stiff way his hand would connect with John's forehead trying to sell the shot.

I was worried because I wasn't informed that any weapons would be part of the finish, all I was told before hand was my own roll in the match and that the finish was supposed to be John rolling up Paul for the win. So you can understand why I panicked when I saw the game slide back into the ring with his weapon of choice in hand.

Lying on the floor I didn't know what the hell was going on, but I was close enough to hear J.R. and King yell that Edge had somehow come back into play, spearing Paul off his feet. The next thing I hear is something about Adam having the sledgehammer, a low blow and then it's all over with John's music blearing throughout the arena. I let out a sigh of relief, "finally" I whispered.

Every week it was like that, no matter what interaction John and Adam were having, I always found myself worrying about the West Newberry native. Praying he was ok and becoming emotionally involved in his matches, something that I had never done in my whole career, not even with Matt.

By the time I manage to sit up, Triple H has taken out everyone in the ring, including the ref. If I didn't know it wasn't real I would find it ironic, that he was the one standing tall when he had that much blood gushing from his face.

The whole scene makes me angry because I know first hand that Paul and John purposely left out that part, knowing that I would fret about it until they cut it out of the finish entirely. I couldn't help it; I was in love with John and every little thing made me anxious when he was inside the squared circle.

They cut the pay per view feed and everyone slowly got up to head to the back, trying their hardest to sell like mother fuckers while still trying not to take to long to leave. Because if they didn't get out of the ring, the fans in attendance would never go home and if the fans didn't go home, we would never be able to leave.

As soon as were safely behind the curtain I feel John's arm slink around my waist, and I feel Adam's eyes burning through me. But I guess I should rewind a bit because I'm sure your all wondering how the punk princess wound up with someone like John Cena…the quote unquote, Doctor of Thuganomics. I'm sure from your point of view it makes no sense at all, yet from mine it makes all the sense in the world.

It's a pretty recent development I guess, it was only a few months ago that I didn't really know the man at all, not really. I'm sure I'd probably seen him around before, we had definitely said our hellos and had our introductions but it wasn't until 4 months ago when this whole feud got started that I ever really talked to the guy. Little did I know then that I would end up head over heals for him.

By then Adam and I were long over, everyone knows that relationships that are based on a lie never last. Yet it was never really a relationship to begin with it, sure I acted like I loved him, but that's all it was…an act. In reality Adam was nothing more then my cowards way out of my relationship with Matt, who after so long together I had just fallen out of love with. It seems hurtful to say you get tired of someone, but I did, I was tired of him and the longer I stayed the worst things seemed to get between us. I knew he would never accept me walking away so I cheated with Adam, and as fucked up as it seems, I tried to get caught. If I didn't want Matt to find those messages I would have deleted them and password protected my phone, but I didn't…I conveniently left my cell lying around any chance I got.

It seemed to take forever to get "caught", I felt so bad screwing around on such a sweet guy, but I knew that if I didn't do something horrible he would never give up on us. There were consequences though, Matt spread it around so much, it blew up so big, that it tarnished my career for good and problem number two, which was probably an even bigger inconvenience, was that Adam said he loved me.

Everyone tries to make him the bad guy in the whole situation, but he wasn't. Nobody was really the bad guy in my mind, everyone was at fault, me included. Because no one knew what Matt was really like, controlling, obsessive and suffocating…and Adam was just a pawn who got emotionally attached in a sexual situation.

So I tried to make it work, I felt I owed it to everyone…maybe Matt would feel a little better in time if he thought I fell in love with someone else and I didn't want Adam to feel like I was leading him on, even if at first I was. But he was also a sweet guy, his heart was in the right place but I just didn't love him.

As a result it was all over as quick as it started. But Vince being the maverick that he is used the whole fucked up mess as a marketing ploy and milked personal pain and emotion for all it was worth. I guess it did have an upside as it catapulted Edge into main event status and in turn lead to me getting to know John.

The feud ultimately began in early January; Adam cashed in the money in the bank and stole the wwe championship from Cena. It all progressed from there turning into the major program that it was, is and probably will be for a while. I just hate having to be in the corner, watching it all unfold, forced to root for Edge for my pay check while I'm hopelessly devoted to his enemy.

However ironic as it was it wasn't until part one of the Edge/Cena saga cooled down did the romance between John and myself heat up. The feud originally lasted about a month and a half; I got to know John well in that short time from working together so much. I was swayed by his charm and we actually started hanging out outside of wwe, not dating but just grabbing lunch when we needed it and heading to laundry mats together in towns we'd pass threw. Those times are some of the fondest memories I have now, just sitting on a dryer that was shaking underneath me, laughing till I was crying with John continuously feeding it quarters making bets that I'd fall off.

But once I stopped seeing him so much, I felt like something was missing. It was only when I was away from him did I face the chemistry we had, something that if I played back tapes I could even see come across on camera.

It was a February afternoon, it was raining if I remember correctly, when I knocked on his door and feverishly shoved my lips to his when he answered…something I had been dying to do, in what felt like forever. And we kind of just never looked back, we became a fast couple and have been together ever since.

Now the feud has been back on about a month after two months of being on the back burner, and I hear tonight it's going to cool down again so there can be another challenger for the title. I'll miss working with John again, but at the same time I wont because at least off camera I can worry as much as I want to.

Adam is distraught over the whole thing, he still professes his love for me any chance he gets, whispering to me on camera, making any extra effort to touch me that he can. On one side I want to punch him in the face live across the world but on the other hand I feel bad for the guy. While I knew his marriage was long over before I ever became involved with him, I still hate know thing that maybe without me in the picture they could have worked it out. It's my only regret in the whole thing… that his wife had to hurt like she did.

He hates John and blames him for us not being together, which is the furthest thing from the truth. I just want to get away from Adam; I can't handle working with him anymore, not when he acts the way he does. And a part of me is afraid that his personal feelings could cross over into the ring and he'll work sloppy with John putting both of them in danger.

Maybe you noticed tonight how sad I looked, how I didn't smile once on camera, how I didn't try and look like I gave a shit about Edge at all. From the moment we came out of that curtain till the moment we went back threw it I didn't feel like playing my part, hell I actually didn't care if Vince canned my ass, I was so mad at him.

All afternoon I was in his office, begging that old man to let me turn on Adam costing him the title some how. I didn't care how it played out, I would have liked to wind up in Cena's corner but all I really wanted was to just get away from Adam. I didn't care if it was supposed to look like an accident and Edge blamed me for his loss and turned on me. I didn't care, I just felt like the storyline should be over, I felt like even the fans wanted it to be over…it just seemed like everyone was waiting for me to turn on him.

But Vince wouldn't give in, and that should just about bring you up to date.

"Babe you ok?" John asks when we make it safely inside his locker room, away from prying eyes, away from Adam.

His voice shakes me from my minds recap of everything that had happened in the past few months and can't help but smile up at him, "I'm ok, it's you I'm worried about."

His arm moves around to my back, rubbing his hand up and down my spine, "I'm fine. That was a pretty nasty spine buster you took, what were you thinking getting in the ring?"

The tone of his voice lets me know that while he's concerned about me, he's also angry that I got involved. "I was afraid you were injured and was buying time, I didn't want Paul to touch you if you were hurt." I tell him, looking down at the tiled floor, busying my eyes by counting all the little squares around my feet.

John tilts my jaw upward, forcing me to look at him before he softly sweeps his lips across mine, "That's sweet red, but I need you too stop worrying. I know you have more years in the ring under your belt then I do, but I promise I can handle myself out there."

"I just love you that's all."

He bends over reaching into the mini fridge and pulls out an ice pack, laying it gently on the top of my head, "I love you too Amy, but lets try and make sure you don't take anymore chairs to the head because of it."

Reaching up I lay my hand on top of his, "How?"

"Just promise me that from now on when you step through that curtain your Lita, not Amy. And while Amy is crazy about him, Lita cannot stand John Cena. Just play a character like you have been since this whole Matt thing ok? It wont hurt my feelings because your just doing your job like anyone else."

"I'll try," I respond closing my eyes as I feel his mouth pressing against my forehead. "That's all I ask." He says, pulling me into another embrace.

"And stop looking so sad out there," He continues, "Be the badass I know you can be. I know being booed so much sucks, trust me I know, but feed off it and use that negative energy to your advantage."

"You always know what to say to make me feel better," I tell him, resting my head on his shoulder.

"That's because I know that everything can only get better."


End file.
